Below is a translation of the confession written by Zheng Xiaoyu, 62, former head of the Chinese State Food & Drug Administration, shortly before he was executed.  I have read it a number of times.  Each time I read it I walk away with a cold, haunting feeling.  I asked my wife, a labor and delivery nurse admittedly fascinated with the beauty of life as as it arrives in this world, if she would read it and tell me what she thought and her reaction thereto.

Her response … ”My goodness.  That man had a family he left behind.  He was desperate to save his life.  I wonder what I would have done and written if I were in his shoes.”

Your thoughts after reading the below?   I am curious.   What would you have said or written if you were in his shoes?  If you were the judge reading the letter, would you have decided life sentence or death, and why?

For a good background article the humanizes Zheng Xiaoyu a bit, see/read the following NY Times article, “A Chinese Reformer Betrays His Cause, and Pays.”

Some are saying the below is his work; others claim it was coerced by the government.  I have no idea which position is true.  Because his lawyers, to my knowledge, have not yet publicly spoken out against or questioned the legitimacy of the confessions authenticity, I have to lean toward assuming the words below are his own.

How I Look on My Mistakes – By Zheng Xiaoyu

March 15 and 16, 2007

“The Communist Party has criticized and educated me and told me about the policies. I started to reflect on myself seriously and painstakingly. Thinking back on what has happened these year, I start to see the problems clearly. For example, why are the friends who gave me money all bosses of pharmaceutical companies? Obviously, because I was in charge of drug administration. Another example, I’ve known these old friends for a long time, why did they give me money only after 1998? Obviously, because the State Drug Administration was established in 1998 and then I was given bigger power. Although these friends gave me money partly because of our friendship, they actually were thinking about my power. I am confessing here that I loosened self-discipline, ignored the bottom line. It is bribery if a civil servant receives money from a business.

Some money wasn’t given to me directly, but through [my wife Liu] Naixue and [my son] Hairong. Naxiue was retired and stayed at home. Hairong was just a student. So their target was still me. Indirect ways were easier for me to accept. So I agreed, consented. This was bribery.

I accepted the money, the justice of power certainly became problematic, the image of the civil servant was undermined, and the image of the Party and government was affected.

The Party and people nurtured me, trusted me and assigned me to such an important position. I didn’t live up to the Party’s expectation. I loosened ideological reform, loosened self-discipline, harmed the Party and the people, committed crimes, for which I feel regretful. Now I have to treat the issue seriously, conduct a thorough self-examination, confess my mistakes, and treat the punishment and education as an act of saving my soul.

Inspired by the policy that honest confession should be rewarded lenient punishment, I have overcome all sorts of wrong excuses and honestly confessed to the Party the fact that I accepted bribes from [pharmaceutical executives] Ge Mengya, Wang Maoxing, Du Lihua, Zhao Buchang, Xu Rongxiang and Fan Minhua; that I knew that Zheng Jun, Yu Wenyong, Wang Xianyu had given bribes [to my wife and son]. I am willing to promise to the Party again that I will help retrieve every penny. If what has been retrieved doesn’t match the amount [I accepted in bribes], I’ll sell my own assets and borrow money from family and friends to make it up. I will also cooperate with the [Supreme People's] Procuratorate Court to clarify the problem, and strive for lenient punishment. I hope the Party will give me the opportunity and a way out.”